When I was young I innately knew that I had to leave my small hometown and go where there was noise, lights, life and people more like me.  I spent hours thinking about far away places and how I would get there. My first stop was New York and I was just 18, naive and overwhelmed in numerous ways. Although I was incredibly intimidated I could not have loved it more. Today, with the passing of time and both myself and the City older, it is no longer intimidating to me. I miss the days of yesteryear. 

Back in the days of the late 80’s and early 90’s the City never resembled the Disneyland that it does now. I hate it. No, I utterly abhor it. I loved not knowing what would happen and being on edge and knowing that something strange would happen walking through Times Square every time I walked through it. I wasted hours watching the street entertainers in Washington Square Park an how can anyone not miss the banter of two angry people telling each other to “Fuck off.” Walk through Alphabet City or Tompkins Square Park? No way. 

Today the City has been tamed.  Memories of a man chaining himself to a light pole with a dozen cops watching or a man digging through the garbage or the whispers of “smoke, sense, smoke” in a dimly lit street or being flashed by a man on the 6 train are all I have of the old days. Well, memories and hundreds of photographs. I used to hide my camera under my coat because back then you never knew what could happen. Yes, I really was flashed on a full 6 train and I wanted to say something like, “Are you really trying to impress me with that?” but those were the days that you never knew if you would be knifed or shot. 

Today I walk around with my camera always at the ready and people actually stop to let me take a picture. Now, don’t get me wrong as I completely appreciate the courtesy. What a boring story! Now when I “see” a photograph, I don’t have to be sneaky and worry that my camera will be stolen. I just pick up the camera and take a picture. Therefor my photographs today compared to those from 15 years ago are much different and much more thought out and much more editorial than the documentary style I had back then. Then, they were just a moment in time. Today I can look, think, plan and see so much more into what I could do rather than flash and dash as I used to.

“Stopped” was taken in midtown during the day. I had nothing to do but my favorite thing— walk. I first saw the clocks and thought how fascinating and imagined people in Paris sharing cocktails in a bistro and people in China sleeping the night away. Then a guy came up to the corner and started drinking coffee. He added to the story of the people in NYC and what they were doing. At this point, I started to take some photographs and how exciting it was when the taxis drove by! It was as if I had stopped time around the world for just a moment. The man was frozen in time, the taxis were stopped dead in their tracks too and around the world, I had forced everyone and everything to just stop for a split second in time. Of course I’m the only one in on the secret but just as well as I’m the only one who matters in this scenario.

I love this photograph because it reminds of Henri Cartier-Bresson. I’ve always admired his work and how he looked for those precious moments in time. He was always ready with his camera and because of that we have his amazing photographs. I may not have been ready to take this photograph 15 years ago when I had to hide my camera. Because of the changes time presents, I was ready and able to see things in a new light. Maybe I don’t have all the crazy stories to tell anymore but I think my images tell their stories much better than they used to and now I can always be ready when they present themselves to me.

I do love the memories and days of old. As fast as time goes by and we wish we could hold on to certain moments, the passing of time cannot be stopped, even for me.